Jason, it’s on like Donkey Kong Galaga.

I hereby challenge you publicly to a duel of epic proportions, to be held at 1984 in downtown Springfield at a date that will not eat into both of our work and church schedules. We shall throw down on Galaga and see who comes out victorious.
The loser must pay for the other person’s coffee/food at the Coffee Ethic, and will also be forced to park at least ten blocks away as punishment for having lost the game. (Oh wait, scratch that, that’s how downtown parking is anyway.)
After my Blogaroni prediction victory over you, I shall prevail once again in an epic Galaga battle. This shall be the sight you will see three times in the match of death:

Accept the challenge or prepare to be called a coward on thy wedding day in front of God and all the witnesses.

You’re challenging the guy who’s had his name on the high score wall at 1984 five times?
How many times have you been up there?
If you think you can run with the Big Dog go ahead but you’ll find out you should have stayed on the porch like a newly neutered puppy.
1984? Please.
How about the Galaga High Score THREE TIMES RUNNING at Funland Arcade in Seaside, Oregon? Level 84, yo.
I reached level 65 in my sleep, with one hand on the controls AND while I was stretched out over the Cruisin’ USA game to steer the car and win that game too.
Last I heard, you only reached Level OT7. You didn’t quite “Clear” the game.
OH SNAP!
Phht. You’re the kid that played Galaga because you couldn’t finish the race in Pole Position and couldn’t handle the shame.
Horse hockey.
I actually never played Pole Position, so you’re partially right — instead I was busy playing Donkey Kong and saving the princess 239384935 times.
I was the reason they changed Jumpman’s name to Mario and made some idiotic game where he had to kick over turtles and stomp little moving mushrooms, and even after he did that he had to hurdle past some clown on a bridge…all to rescue a Oompa Loompa who told him that the princess was in ANOTHER CASTLE.
Well, real men moved on from Galaga to Xevious because they liked the challenge of not only having to hit the planes in the air but the targets on the ground too.
You’re so one dimensional sometimes.
I don’t have any comeback because I am still focused on how stupid of a name Jumpman was. They should have called him something like Hayashimakatsu or something.
At any rate, GAME OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONNNNNNNNNN
I’ve got mad Pong skillz.