The World According To Chris Brewer

Before I post tonight’s Camp memory, I’d like to say how saddened I am to hear the news of this morning’s tragedy in Charleston, South Carolina where nine firefighters died battling a huge blaze at a furniture store.

Today while I was working at Apple we had a few firefighters from Tualatin Valley Fire & Rescue stop in and chat for awhile while looking at MacBooks. It was pretty neat to talk with them about their jobs and how close of a camaraderie the guys in the firehouse build up over time. They sounded kinda sad when we talked about the tragedy in Charleston, and they said it would be unimaginable to go through what the guys down there are going through.

I thanked them for what they do to help us every day and wished them peace and safety in their line of work, and told them I’d be praying for them.

Let’s hold our nation’s rescue workers and firefighters up in prayer, because they definitely do have a dangerous job…as evidenced this morning by what happened in Charleston.

Now, onto the memory…

Memory #5 - The Ultimate Camp Prank (Senior Camp 2002)

My very last year of Senior Camp was one of the best shenanigans ever pulled at Camp. Caleb Alexander and I brought some miniature mirrors and a battery-powered strobe light, and with Joel Gibby’s (our group leader that year) blessing we headed down to the Bat Barn after church service on the very first night.

We set up the mirrors everywhere…one on the far left side of the field, one on the right, two in the middle…and it looked crazy once we turned the strobe on. It looked like light was coming from everywhere. My brother Jason was in on the prank, and he started getting the kids in his cabin riled up by telling them there were people down by the bat barn and having them go out to look at the lights.

Caleb and I hid in the trees and threw pinecones at kids who came out to investigate. Unfortunately (or, was it actually fortunately?), Al Kenning, who led the investigation, ran out into the field and started screaming at the top of his lungs, “INTRUDERS!!! SOMEONE CALL JOHNNY PARKER!!!” In no time, the deans, my uncle and aunt Johnny and Benita, would be on their way. We had to get everything done quickly so we had to change our plan — we couldn’t run into the bat barn and scare anyone. We had to scare everyone then and there.

When the kids started heading back to their cabins, Caleb and I started mouthing off to some of them on the way back…we were still hiding in the trees and we started to whisper stuff like, “Hey kids, I’m the spirit of fear, you’ll never make it out alive” and “I am a spirit of doubt.” A bit over-the-top but it really riled them up. They ran, freaking out, and some of them crying, to their cabins and some of them were pleading the blood of Jesus over their lives and praying for safety on the way back. Joel Senior even got into the act, wailing and singing a crazy tune while hiding with us. Al joined us as well and had some fun, whooping it up and saying weird stuff about walking around with a samurai sword and calling the cops.

For some reason we ran out of good names of spirits and Caleb looked at one kid and said “Hey, I’m the spirit of Nike. Just do it.” When the kid ran back to his cabin, he told the group leader he had been oppressed by the spirit of Nike. The group leader had some good laughs and threw a Nerf football into the trees, beaning me in the head and eliciting a big “OW!”

We stepped out of the trees and got pelted with pinecones from all the kids. Johnny Parker came down to the cabins to a surprisingly calm setting, but after he was told what happened, Caleb and I got a good talking to.

The next day, we won the Clean Cabin Award with a good bribe for Uncle Johnny…a nice big tub of Tootsie Rolls in the middle of the floor with a sign that said “JOHNNY PARKER IS THE MAN, AND BENITA IS BENITA-FUL.”

Gotta love the Camp atmosphere.

I’d like to dedicate the memory of this post to Al Kenning, who tragically died last November in a car accident in which alcohol was a factor. Miss you man, as crazy as you were.