The World According To Chris Brewer

Never thought I’d say that, especially after moving here, but it’s true.

I am beyond excited to visit my parents with Aftan by my side next week. It’s gonna be great.

Youth service tonight was great, and it was a great message by Pastor Smith talking about how unforgiveness in our hearts stops us from having a fulfilling relationship with God and also hurts those whom we hold bad feelings against. Great message.

The past few weeks at church I’ve been really wishing we had a separate young adult class on Wednesday nights. Right now the young adults are paired up with the high school/junior highers (basically those above the age of 13). It’s a weird setup in my opinion. It’s obvious that young adults are on a completely different wavelength than teenagers, so it just seems right to me to give the young adults their own time. We don’t have that here at New Horizons, we didn’t have it at Lakeside, and I believe myself and others at the church would really benefit from it. I don’t think I’ve been in a class/Bible study that was specifically designed for my age group since I was 16. Then I was thrust into youth ministry at the age of 17 because the Kelso COGOP couldn’t find anyone else to do it, and I in all my infinite wisdom accepted the job. While I was still in high school.

That brings me to a personal standpoint as to why I need to be in a young adult-oriented Bible study. Many times already I have been instructed to pray with a younger member of the group during altar call, thus robbing me of the time I need to pray and try to work out some spiritual tweaks of my own. I know that sounds selfish, but seriously, if I’m hurting spiritually and need prayer myself, why on God’s green earth am I being instructed to pray with a younger member of the youth group? The mere fact that I’m 22 and the kid next to me is 16 doesn’t mean I automatically need to go up and pray for him just because I’m older.

I struggle too, and it’s tough to stomach the fact that even in the midst of my spiritual struggles (I’m a pretty transparent guy), I’m looked upon as someone with something to give at that very moment. Please folks, just let me pray and I’d really appreciate it if someone came to me and prayed for me too…

I’m definitely not bitter anymore about my prominent role as a human toilet at Lakeside Church. But the exact opposite of what happened there is happening here at New Horizons, yet the situations have a striking similarity. At Lakeside I was ready and willing to serve as a member of the youth leadership team to which I had been appointed, and I wasn’t utilized. Here at New Horizons, I don’t feel in my spirit to contribute to the youth ministry at this present time, yet at times I am pushed and prodded toward it. And through both these time periods I have been on a spiritual roller coaster with wonderful high points and terrible low points.

I never thought I’d say this, but church has got me burnt out a bit right now. I love everyone in the church but man, sometimes it’s just a bit much.

That being said, my walk with God progresses every day. Don’t be led to think I’m not doing well with the Lord. It’s just some auxiliary stuff I’m struggling with. We’ve all had our spiritual low points, some more often than others. I think I’m definitely in the “more often” category.

This too shall pass.